Do you remember when you couldn’t wait to go swimming, but you had to put on the brakes and wait for 30 minutes to go by and it seemed like it took forever. Your mother had spoken and that was the rule.
That wasn’t the only rule that we had to live by. And as time went by, we made up some rules of our own to live by. What follows are some of those rules. As you read them you might think of some of your own, that were etched in stone at your house.
1. If you crossed your eyes for too long, they would get stuck that way.
2. Your blanket could protect you from anybody and anything.
3. If you didn’t get out of the bathtub when you let the water out, you would get sucked down the drain.
4. If you touched a toad, you would get warts on your hands.
5. The moon is really made of cheese.
6. Teachers never left school. They lived at school.
7. If you eat enough carrots, you will be able to see in the dark.
8. Chocolate milk comes from brown cows.
9. If you stepped on a crack on the sidewalk, you would break your mother’s back. If you stepped in a hole, you would break mother’s sugar bowl.
10. Lightning came from God’s big camera in the sky, so you should smile when it flashed,
11. It is the trees moving causes the wind.
12. People said you could be anything you wanted to be when you grew up. Most kids wanted to be an animal or a superhero.
13. All cats were female and all dogs were male.
14. If you swallowed a watermelon seed a watermelon would grow in your stomach.
15. If you inhaled the helium from your balloon, you would be able to float.
16. Mothers have eyes in the back of their head.
17. Drinking coffee would stunt your growth.
18. If you kissed someone, you were married.
19. Sitting too close the television would ruin your eye sight.
20. If you made an ugly face, it would freeze and stay that way.
21. People that lived long ago, lived in a black and white world because the pictures were always in black and white.
22. If you were bad, Santa put coal in your stocking.
23. If you keep digging, you will come out in China.
24. If you pee in the swimming pool the water will change color and everyone will know it was you.
25. When you gave your offering at church, the preacher left it on the altar and God came and picked it up after everyone left.
It is good for us to think about the past and how our imagination helped us cope with our rules. Some of the rules listed in this column were new to me. Maybe I should go back to my childhood and try them.
How did you do? Did you remember or did it make you think of your own silly rules that you had when you were a kid?